Bad Break

Just got home a little bit ago…from the hospital. This afternoon Nelson fell off a ladder at work. They were putting up the roof trusses. They were on the next to the last one. He was only 4’ up the ladder. He came down on his left ankle, pile driving it into the ground and spinning, shattering the ankle and breaking the tibia (back leg bone) right below the knee. He couldn’t move. They took him to the ER in the squad. The ER Dr. decided to admit Nelson. Nelson is severely obese (5’9” and nearly 350#), so there’s no way he’d be mobile.

When we finally got to Nelson’s room, we finally saw the orthopedic specialist. He said that there was no way he wanted to touch Nelson’s ankle. It was that bad. He recommended a foot and ankle specialist within his group—the doc he’d want to cut on him. So Nelson is going to meet with PT in the morning to see if he can get mobile. If he can then he’ll come home and we’ll see the specialist on Monday.

The probably course of treatment will be to do some kind of stretcher thing on Nelson’s leg and ankle while they wait for the swelling to come down (about a week) and then do surgery to repair the damage the following week. Surgery will include pins and plates.

Here’s the thing… I don’t see Nelson being mobile. There is no way for him to put any weight on that ankle. So will they keep him until that doc can see him? Questions I have no answers for.

When he does finally get home, what am I going to do with him? Our bedroom is upstairs. I’m trying to figure out how to get a bed for him to sleep in. We’ll bring down the AC from our room and hang blankets on the door to the back of the house and the one going upstairs and he can just live in the living room…if I can find a bed. Beth suggested that we call a rental place. We’ll see.

Saturday morning…At midnight last night, I was finally getting tired. I was falling asleep while trying to type this so I went to bed. I didn’t sleep well—I never do when Nelson isn’t there. I woke up at my weekday-work time of 5am. And here I am trying to finish this.

When I drove home from the hospital last night, I shut the radio off and just followed my thoughts. I like to do that…I may have lots of time to do that if Nelson has to spend much time in the hospital. Right now, he’s an hour away. He’ll be farther when he has the surgery.

But back to the thoughts…It was one of those weirdly ironic things that this should happen yesterday. Buddy came back to work yesterday. I was very happy to see him. I had so many work related questions. I also had lots of wonderments as to how he was. My heart ached though to see how deflated he was. We got a few minutes to talk. He’s lost 18 pounds, he’s not sleeping, he didn’t want to be at work, but he didn’t want to stay home. The kids are doing better than he is in his opinion.

I tried to imagine what it would be like without Nelson. Nelson has been in chronic, recurringly severe, pain since August 1983 when he first injured his back. That injury just seemed to open the door to everything else getting worse. I will confess that there have been times when I told God it would be ok to take him home. I didn’t say those things with a mean spirit, but with a broken heart. It just hurts so much to see him hurt so bad.

And now this. This wound feels like a blow to me. Is that selfish? So be it. It’s where I am and how I’m feeling right now. And here’s why: Nelson doesn’t heal well—if at all. In my mind’s eye, I’m seeing Walter Brennon walking with that side hitch of his. I don’t know if he hurt, but I know Nelson will. When I think about this injury I just see another source of constant pain for my husband. And here’s another admission: I want to know why?

Well, I need to get a shower and get some things done before going to the hospital. I have to go buy a new tire for the car so that I don’t have a blowout on my way to the hospital. I wasn’t too worried driving around town until today because I knew I was going to get it replaced. But I was sure praying I’d make it home last night. I did.

If you think about it, I could use a prayer for wisdom and patience—I don’t do well with the slow “we’ll-get-around-to-it” pace that hospitals and doctors have. Steve and Rhonda are going to come help me either move Nelson home or move him to the other hospital. Thank God for friends…especially good friends with vans!

I’ll be back later to bring you an update..